Youtube: Old fart, never shuts up, loves fast food and staying inside, cuddles animals, can also be scary.
Instagram: Beautiful, B-list celebrity, appreciates art, emo, shy, needs a haircut.
Facebook: A mess, a huge buzzkill, pronounces gifs as “jifs,” loves wine.
Snapchat. Little hottie, always thirsty, fears emojis, can eat 90 hot dogs, loves TV, weirdo.
Twitter: Will never shut up, always screaming, no attention span, meme master.
LinkedIn: Has only laughed twice, thinks Pixar movies are just OK, loves bread, cries at sunsets.